The Sports Fans Dilema

Ok, here we go…this could happen you.

It's a beautiful Saturday afternoon and you're enjoying a brilliant day on your patio. The sun is shining and birds are chirping. You've got a cold beer in one hand and freshly grilled burger in the other. You take a bite of char grilled deliciousness and remember back to an easier time in your life. You catch a piece of pickle as it falls into your lap. The frothy cold beer touches your lips and everything's right in world…

The kids next door start splashing around the pool and snap you back to reality. As you gaze to the left past your Philadelphia Eagles flag, to the wooden fence that separates your yard, your heart races. You take a double take to make sure you're not imagining the horror. You pinch your arm and feel the sting…this is really happening.

As if Michael Vick signing with the Eagles wasn't enough, an actual Cardinal has the audacity to snack out of your cherished Eagles Bird Feeder. Doesn't he know the rules? That retched red feathered fowl has tainted your precious bird feeder. You'd pull out the pellet gun, but the fear of PETA storming your house, halts you in your tracks. For some reason, all you can think to do is to yell, "GET OUT OF THERE!!" The kids next door stop splashing and look over the fence to see what's happening.

The bird won't stop munching on your bird food and it occurs to you that the only way to get rid of it without violence is to scare it away. Like a mad man, you run over to the fence screaming and flailing your arms. As it turns out, Cardinals are a rather persistent bird and apparently you've stocked the feeder with some delicious seeds because he just won't leave.

You continue to loudly shoo the bird away with no success…..and finally with no fear, almost mocking you, the bird flies away on its own. You almost hear the bird laughing as you wipe the bird feeder down with some disinfectant spray. Your heart beat returns to normal and you return to your beer. You relax into the patio chair and tell yourself "Next time, I'll just use the pellet gun and teach that bird a lesson." You take another refreshing sip and do your best to pretend the gut retching event never occurred.

What would you do if your favorite décor was soiled by the enemy? Could you restrain yourself like the brave guy in the story or would you have the courage to poison the food and show that bird where he doesn't belong?

These are important questions to ask yourself because you don't want to get caught by surprise when an Oriole takes up residence in your Blue Jay's bird house...think about it.